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30, Thirsty, & Trying

I tried my best… (with a glass of rosé in hand)

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it may be 47 degrees, but it may as well be spring to me. #nyc #lovelyday

If you know me and love me, then you’re familiar with my “on a side note,” ssss 👋🤪😂🤦🏼‍♀️🗯 #keepcalmandrambleon #longstoryshort #devilsinthedetails #thanksKU

I was partying like it was 1999 when you were born... cuz it was 1999. Happy 20th birthday to my beautiful niece Kristen 🖤🎁🎂🎉🥂

happy, happy birthday to my sister. I’m so lucky to have you ❤️🎁🎂🎉🥂 #eventhegrosspicsareworthit #happybirthday

It’s been a year since I lost my Dad. Today is day 364, the year anniversary of the last time I talked to my Dad, before everything would change and he would be gone. It’s been a difficult process, one that I’ve been working through very slowly. Still, I can’t believe it’s already a year. I hate it. At first, it was impossible to mention him – even think about him – without breaking down. Now, I find myself a little bit stronger, though results may vary. Our family has even had little moments where we have been able to laugh about certain memories, and it was so nice in those moments to laugh and appreciate it – to remember him without the tears. I hate the idea that I’m getting used to the fact that he isn’t here anymore. I don’t want to get used to that. And so, the actual year anniversary makes me feel the same way – anything under 365 days wasn’t that long ago… but a whole year. An entire year without him, and so many more ahead. However, I find it both odd and beautiful that gratitude and sadness can sit so closely together. Every time I miss him, I immediately feel so grateful for all the memories of him I have, and for knowing I was his daughter. I choose to celebrate that now as I remember what a wonderful man he was. 🖤

in case anyone wondered what the definition of true love is, it’s your 12 year-old son buying you a Valentine’s gift (with his own money!) and surprising you with it before the actual day because he was just that excited to give it to you. I like to think that maybe I’m doing an ok job ❤️🖤❤️😍😭 #bestkidever #sosweet #bestvalentinesgiftever #valentines #myheart

Billy Joel is great in concert 🎵🎼🎹 #xmasgift #musicalbucketlist #billyjoel

This lighting makes me look even whiter than I am #sowhite #omgkarenyoucantjustaskpeoplewhytheyrewhite #latefriendsgiving #alsoismyhandok

happy new year 🎆 #2019 #happynewyear #goals #cleanslate

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